Unexcused Absences

Man and hobbits, Louvre

Recently, I realized that hobbits must actually live quietly in France. After this shocking realization, I began to gather photographic evidence of the half-sized inhabitants made famous by J.R.R. Tolkien’s books. To be clear, I haven’t actually seen a hobbit, just lots of evidence, which I happily present to the readers of this blog.

I assume hobbits in the past must have moved, lived and worked more freely than they do now. While at the Louvre, I noticed several paintings that feature hobbits alongside humans. Please carefully examine at the painting on the right. It does not depict a man with children as I first assumed, but rather a group of hobbits and a human. Are they all guild members posing for a portrait together? Or, does the painting commemorate some event involving these gentlehobbits and this gentleman?

Lest you protest that this work shows a man with his five male children, let me present this painting (also at the Louvre) which clearly shows a man and his child. Hobbits look like small adults and children look like children. Note the adult faces in the painting at the right, and compare their faces to the child’s face in the painting below. The master painters of Europe clearly knew the difference between humans and hobbits!

Man and child, Louvre

A number of older residences across France must have housed (still house?) hobbits. I regularly see doors clearly sized for hobbits, not for humans. Here are photos of a few, with me for scale.

Hobbit doorway

Hobbit doorway

A hobbit’s door and mailbox

Unconvinced? The above, un-retouched photo offers the strongest evidence yet suggesting the continued presence of hobbits. Because if there are no hobbits in France, why are they receiving mail?