In Memory of Ruth 1927 – 2010 (she said)
by Heather 21 Dec 2010Kent’s mother passed away on Sunday. We miss her terribly, and celebrate her memory.
Ruth Christian passed away December 19, 2010 following a massive cerebral hemorrhage. Her passing was painless; she simply never awoke from her afternoon nap. She bravely fought the encroachment of Alzheimer’s for years. She leaves behind an enormous hole, impossible to fill, in my life and the lives of her son (my husband) Kent and her husband of 50 years, Don.
I first met my future mother-in-law skiing. Kind and welcoming, she and her husband Don, immediately took me in. From the moment I ‘stole’ her son away until the last time I saw her, she made me understand I was part of her family. I am so thankful for the years of fun, laughter and skiing we had together. She is an inspiration both for hard work (she certainly worked hard), and for enjoying life (when she wasn’t working).
Ruth had great adventures over the years, too many to recount here, traveling before it was trendy or easy. She originally envisioned DC as an overnight stop en route on a driving adventure along on the newly completed Pan American Highway. The folks who emptied her car that night and stole everything she owned will never know how grateful we all are that Ruth was forced to stay here and work, ultimately meeting her future husband Don at the corner of 20th and Sunderland Place (Dupont Circle)! That’s right, Kent owes his existence to inner-city car thieves.
Ruth lived every day at full throttle, waking early and heading to bed late. I remember she carried a paperback book in her purse, telling me she intended to finish it when she had break. She carried that book in her purse for 30 years … and never finished it. There was always work to do, friends to see, parties to throw, and fun to be had. I don’t think Ruth was ever bored in her entire life.
I also know of and experienced her legendary generosity, which occasionally bordered on what can only be called stupidity now that she isn’t here to hear me say it. Never a big one for causes, Ruth’s attention, courage, and considerable energy were focused on people, not organizations. During the race riots in DC following the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., she loaded up her car with Kent’s baby things, drove along streets with burning buildings and riots, found a young mother and her son who needed a hand, and gave them Kent’s outgrown clothing and toys. When she saw a problem she could fix, she simply took care of it.
Ruth loved the outdoors and considered hiking with Don to be the best form of vacation. To keep up with Kent, she began ski-racing in her 50’s, competed nationally, and continued to ski into her 80’s. Ruth gave me my first pair of skis, took me through my first race, constantly encouraged me in my favorite sport, and beat me on the race course into her mid 70’s.
Ruth had some great sayings over the years. Here are some of my favorites:
-When trying to get Kent and me to go do something fun when we had chores, “I used to worry that I had to have the house clean before Don and I went somewhere to have fun, and I wasted a lot of time.”
-On eating ice cream, “Oh, I’m just trying to fill in my wrinkles.”
-And a favorite of all of us over the years, “Why don’t you join us for dinner? I was about to …” a)”put on a ham”, b)”grill a steak” or c)”put this in the oven.”
Ruth will be deeply missed by those she left behind. We can celebrate her memory by opening up our homes and kitchens to friends, old and new, or by setting out on an adventure with a willingness to work hard and with an open heart.
We will hold a wake here in the DC area in January. Her ashes will be returned to her beloved Canada later this year.
What a lovely tribute, Heather. It sounds like Ruth’s spirit lives on in you and Kent. I like her advice on not worrying about cleaning the house prior to having fun. (Wise advise!) You, Kent and Don are in my thoughts during this time of mourning and remembrance. I’ll think of you guys during my walk home through Dupont tonight.
What a wonderful woman.
Thank you so much for writing this Heather! I do recall the Ice cream/wrinkle filling comments and was blessed to be the on the receiving end of “won’t you join us for dinner…” Many, many ski memories over many years. I will miss seeing her out and about. Love to you, Kent and Don. I’ll see you all soon.
CB
I never remember seeing Ruth without a smile on her face! What a lovely woman. Heather, you have done a stellar job writing down the “best of Ruth.” You three (Don, Kent and Heather) are very much in my thoughts at this time.
Eva
Heather, what a beautiful tribute to your mother-in-law. Kent, I only know too well how had it is to lose your mom since I gust lost mine in April. It truly sucks. I’m so glad you have such awesome memories of your time together. Take care you two.
A beautiful tribute to a beautiful soul and treasure of a human being. We should all be so generous and hospitable.
I visited Aunt Ruth and Uncle Don in the days following Hurricane Katrina. No surprise to all who knew her, Ruth lost hours and hours of sleep every night as she agonized over how to help those in the aftermath of Katrina’s devastation. I remember how she wanted to offer the chalet at Bryce Mountain as shelter to those left homeless. It’s amazing that such a giant heart could fit in the most slender of figures! Miss you Aunt Ruth.
I too am blessed for knowing Ruth. Finding myself single at 55, I began a new life finally coming to the eastern shore of Maryland. Ruth took me in and made me a part of their Christmas. Yes, she invited me to eat. She even made me a stocking to go along with her, Heather, Kent, and Don’s stockings. She made me a part of the family. I so needed a family for Christmas, Thanksgiving, birthdays, and mother’s day. Having a family, especially at Christmas, has made all the difference. No one should have to celebrate alone and she understood. I will always be so thankful that Ruth rescued me. My heart hurts for Heather, Kent, and Don.
I met the Ruth for the first time when we moved across the street in 1972. I have always known her to be a wonderful mother and an exceptionally kind person. She will be greatly missed by our family. All of you are in our thoughts. This was a very nice tribute Heather.
Cyndy
Your words are wonderful! I remember meeting her for the first time and being so happy that Heather had such a marvelous woman in her life! We were lucky enough to join the family at Bryce (even my brother and friend were welcomed) for a fun-filled weekend!
David and I know first hand the anguish of losing someone to the horror of Alzheimer’s! Our prayers have been and will continue to be with all three of you for healing of your hearts! We love you!
Dear Aunt Ruth,
May your tender and loving soul soar thru the heavens with the same grace and kindness as you have shown us all here on earth.
I love you Aunt Ruth.
I hope everyone clicks on the postage stamp photos. The 1st one of Ruth (and the enfant terrible) is breathtakingly beautiful and the one w/ young teenager terrible is memorable. Ruth was so incredibly pleasant to talk with. Just in a word “Sweet”
What a stirring tribute to truly wonderful person. All of us who had the pleasure knowing Ruth could not help but be touched by her spirit. We will all miss her presence immeasurably, especially on the slopes she enjoyed so much. In this difficult time, take heart in knowing that our thoughts are always with you and that Ruth will live on in our hearts and memories.